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Dating and Relationships – How do I know what a good partner is?

We provide spiritual solutions for people that are searching for a new partner and to get married.  We see many times men and women that have found someone are confused and have a doubt whether to move on and commit.

The following is a very important point to think about when you are thinking about whether your relationship works and where it can go.

In Genesis 2:18 God said.  “It is not good that man is alone; I shall make him a helpmate opposite him.”

This is what a good husband or wife should be, a help mate, but opposite you.

Why opposite you?

A person’s strengths and talents are revealed and grow more and more when their is something opposing him. Somebody that shakes him up. revives him, inspires him.

In order for a man or women to become greater and stronger, he needs some sort of help from the outside. Your partner when he or she helps you and pushes and points out our strengths and weaknesses.

We learn from a story of the great Rabbi Akiva, who was a great religious  teacher of the first century still today known as “Chief of the Sages”.  When Akiva was 40 years old he was an uneducated shepherd working for a wealthy man in Jerusalem.

The man’s daughter Rachel noticed his modesty and fine character traits and offered to marry him if he would agree to begin studying Torah. When her father found out she had secretly married a poor unlearned man, he was furious and swore that he would never help her forcing Akiva and his wife lived in poverty.

By the urging of his wife, Akiva spent twenty four years away from home, pursuing his studies and returned accompanied by 24,000 disciples. When his wife came out to greet him, some of his students, not knowing who she was, pushed her aside. But Akiva exclaimed, “Let her alone; for what is mine and yours, is hers.”  Meaning all that I have become is due to her strength and persistence.

If I was able to have the strength to become Rabbi Akiva, it is all from the strength of my partner.

Thus when we are choosing a partner we need to look at who is going to inspire us and revitalize us. With whom can we achieve the most and reach our fullest potential. Sometimes 1 plus 1 is zero; and sometimes 1 plus 1 is not 2, its 10 and 20 and even more. Sometimes the opposing character traits are a lot more valuable than those that work together.  Sometimes opposing forces will push each other to greater heights.

So when you look for a partner, you should be careful to look for a certain personality  that will combine with yours to build a greater home and will not drag you down.

You each need to inspire each other and be able to bring out all the good inside the other. So that the sum of the two of you together is a lot greater than it was when you were alone.

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